Statues, forever
(thoughts of Supreme Leader, translated by
scribe).
It’s a shame how petty-minded some people
are. The Central Vista remodeling project is fairly cheap and will be finished
quickly (how much do you think the Great Pyramids cost? How long did it take to
build them?). And a modest residence for the Vice-President and a humble
mansion for the PM of the largest democracy in the world, an emerging
(nuclear-tipped) superpower. Such a fuss, so much kerfuffle and brouhaha.
Anyway, it’s all part of our re-Make in India programme to modify the history
and geography of India.
What we need is a statue that no one will
forget. So let’s look at the competition.
“The tallest statue in the world stands on
a 58 m (190 ft) base with 240 m (787 ft) total monument height.” That’s it,
Patelbhai’s Statue of Unity [1] !
Ours!
Number 2 is the Spring Temple Buddha in
Henan, China: “Stands on a 19.3 m (63 ft) lotus throne, and other stacked base
platforms of various height. 208 m (682 ft) total monument height.” [1].
#3: Laykyun Sekkya, Myanmar: “Stands on a
13.41 m (44 ft) lotus throne. 129.2 m (424 ft) total monument height” [1].
Notice how half of them in the top 10 are
Buddhas? But for some strange reason some of the Buddhas are Reclining! Somehow,
Christ the Redeemer doesn’t make the cut of the top10. And, luckily, one major
Prophet ruled himself out of the competition for good.
What about the oldest statues? The oldest
statue is [2]: “The oldest known life-sized statue is Urfa Man found
in Turkey which is dated to around 9,000 BC.” Let’s not waste time
with statuettes, although, just for the record: “The Venus of Berekhat
Ram, an anthropomorphic pebble found in northern Israel and dated to at least 230,000 years before
present, is claimed to be the oldest known statuette. ” [2].
I mean, you need something lasting, for
the ages, like the Colossus of Rhodes, one of the Seven Ancient Wonders of the
World. But you have these liberals, crazy about political correctness, who
created the hashtag #Rhodesmustfall.
As they all say it’s all about location, location,
location. Some sites – prone to earthquakes, tsunamis, hurricanes, tornados,
forest fires – will not make the grade from a statue-survival point of view.
When you think of long-term survival - in
geological terms - you think of mountains.
Mountainous statues:
a) The Leshan Giant Buddha is a 233 ft tall
stone statue, built between 713 and 803 (during the Tang dynasty),
depicting Maitreya [2].
b) Mount Rushmore [3]: “Representing important events and themes
in our history, Presidents George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln
and Theodore Roosevelt were selected. Each face is approximately 60 feet in
height and with noses longer than 20 feet. Their mouths are also about 18 feet
wide.”
Well, their mouths are
wide – in the American tradition – but in size they are disappointing.
c) The Bamiyan Buddhas [4]:
“The larger of the two figures, located on
the western end (on the right in the photo above), measured 175 feet in height.
The art historian Susan Huntington has argued that it represented the Buddha
Vairochana. The smaller of the two monumental statues, located to the east,
depicted the Buddha Shakyamuni. This figure was also enormous and measured 120
feet in height.” [4].
However, this is rather disturbing. We are
surrounded by these madmen who believe that any statue is a creation of the
devil and should be blown up…and others who pull them down in the name of
political correctness.
I think we may need to get the Geological
Survey of India to wander around the Himalayas for a suitable site. The major
advantage is that pilgrims need not waste time and money in going to
Kailash-Manasrover, when they can visit the best statue in the Himalayan
ranges. Maybe more than one (as insurance)? And mountains call to
mind…earthquakes!
The Statue of Liberty is made of copper
and is 305 feet tall (including the pedestal), while the Gommateshwara statue
is 57 feet high and made out of a single block of granite [5]. But it is so
tall that it can be seen 30 kms away! Now you’re talking!
The statue of Christ in Rio de Janeiro [6]
is 98 feet high, on a 26 foot pedestal. But the nice idea is that it’s on the 2,300 feet high Corvocado mountain so it is seen from much further off. Smart!
It can be seen from hundred kms away in all directions…and it’s high enough to be
safe from tsunamis.
Surprisingly, statues carved out of
mountain-sides are not as tall as the completely man-made ones. I’m sure the
scientists can explain why.
Anyway, Shashi T. sent me this poem, I
don’t know why:
“ On
the pedestal, these words appear:
My
name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
L Look
on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
Nothing
beside remains. Round the decay
Of
that colossal Wreck, boundless and bare
The
lone and level sands stretch far away.” [7]
Stupid
fellow! Why build a statue in a desert, where no one can see it?
Anyway,
these engineers I know say the statue should be covered by a super-hydrophobic
film (so water slides off it), coated in super-luminescent paint (so it is clearly
visible) and made of shape-memory alloy (so it never forgets the shape it is
designed to represent). And it will re-assemble itself if it is blown up. Take
that, Shashi!
But
there is a still a question for engineers to answer: the Burj Dubai is 2,717
feet high [8]. Then why not a statue at least that high? I think, for me, they should
aim for a statue at least 1 kilometer.
Anyway,
right now I’m working on my next project. My good friend Xi told me a few years
ago about his scientist [9] who has worked out how to clone human beings. I
think we should invite the fellow here…I could give him some of my samples (and
a few billion dollars) to start him off…OK, I know it's not literal immortality, but it's close.
References:
1. 1. https://www.google.com/search?q=top%2010%20tallest%20statues%20in%20world
2. 2. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statue
3. 3. https://www.doi.gov/blog/mount-rushmore-national-memorial-presidential-tribute
5. 5. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gommateshwara_statue
6. 6. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christ_the_Redeemer_(statue)
7. 7. https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/46565/ozymandias
8. 8. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burj_Khalifa
9. 9. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/He_Jiankui_affair
